Get a job and find a place to live. SCENARIO 2: STAY WITH THE PERSON YOU LOVE. Man and woman making love in bed. FATHER IS BLESSED WITH A CHILD BUT MISARABLE. I know life would be so much easier if we were together, but I don't know if it's worth it. And which case, most would be use safe sex and if thy got pregnant, they would try for an abortion. 'Don't expect rewards in love': woman, 32, who desperately wants a baby says she dated 100 men in a year, renewing marriage pressure debate in China A woman went on more than 100 dates. Same boat. Being in a loveless relationship is not a good example for the LO you already have and the one on the way. Add to Collection. I am trying REALLY hard to find some common ground with him, to love him, or even like him but the more time goes on the more miserable I am. I agree that love is more a choice than a feeling. Next time, WATCH BEFORE YOU LEAP, U see how some guys end up sleeping with gurls dey do not love?? But I don't feel the need to hold that up as a shield (though every time I see a movie where the childless woman is the villain I understand why my fellow non-parents doth protest too much . After having a baby, a woman will be, on average, 2.5 to 5 lbs. Tell her at home and in private. WTF re u saying tat u will nt marry her if I was tat gal u will marry by force so tat when u die n return u will fu*k people that u love total rubbish.Now u want freedom my ass u wont get so whos gonna to marry ur baby mommy?? BE RESPOSIBLE MAKE SURE TO BE THERE FOR THE CHILD. She got pregnant 3 months after meeting him. I do want to be a father but i always imagined it different, like being with a woman that i am in love with. Hey I know exactly how you feel. How I wish she can understand and let me leave my life and be free. She was expressing her feelings and thoughts about feeling like she won't love her child which she should probably talk to her doctor or a therapist about since I'm pretty sure there is a form of depression you can have before having the child but can't think of the name of it off the top of my head. We didn't have to be. The #1 app for tracking pregnancy and baby growth. Can't and haven't said a word to anyone about how i feel. Though it didn't work out, I never regretted it. I'm in love with a married man And his wife is pregnant. I got my, now wife, pregnant but she never loved me, in fact a month before she got pregnant she actually went to spend the night with some dude at a hotel in a different city, but she told me she just wanted to go away for a couple of days. The problem I have now is that have a beautiful baby girl with one girl I impregnated whom I dont love. A lot of women are alone while pregnant or with young children and they have a life they can be proud of. This is it, i went and made my life more complicated than it already was by adding a new factor, a child, to the equation. I would be too miserable too even think of looking at other women. If you have the "baby blues" you might not notice the sadness or moodiness right away. How can I believe I fathered the child if she's been unfaithful ? Remember, the decision you make will decide whether you will be happy or not in the near future. Life is beautiful but you don't have a clue Sun and ocean blue Their magnificence, it don't make sense to you Black beauty, oh oh oh Black beauty, oh oh oh I paint the house black My wedding dress black leather too You have no room for light Love is lost on you I keep my lips red To seem like cherries in the spring Darling, you can't let everything He's not all bad. My boyfriend cheated on me with his baby mama and now she is pregnant but I still love him HELP!! It has been the hardest most brutal experience of my life. Sounds like she was looking for a sugar daddy and ended up getting pregnant. I want to be a father!!! Rightfully so! YOU GOT THIS! He wasn't meant for marriage, he was a party guy, a free bird, and only got married because he was afraid I'd sue him for child support later. Wear a condom, or allow some woman to own your future (and your money) for a couple decades of your life! We respect everyones right to express their thoughts and opinions as long as they remain respectful of other community members, and meet What to Expects Terms of Use. Obviously she is going to get custody if we split up. I am wondering if i can and how i can win my ex back. My ex won't come back to me after I hurt h Ex girlfriend is pregnant with her new boyfriend months after breaking up with me. But shes not the type, shes fond of me un-necessarily. It just reads so snobby and lazy. maybe take a pre-marital class and figure out some common ground to build a relationship on Nine years ago I was mad in love with my first boyfriend. You decided to have a child with a man you barely know, you use him and his money (as you wrote, he can afford to pay for your car and other stuff) and you want us to praise you. So are you guys in a relationship or just friend with benefits? most times the child bears all the burnt of this relationship as the child would be looked upon as some sort of curse to both parties life the father will hate the child instead of loving it and the mother will eventual resent her child. woman in labor woman giving birth Sort by: Most popular Woman with newborn baby Pretty woman holding a newborn baby in her arms I feel bad for you but you basically gave him the green light to control you. Don't just jump into the discussion; ease your way into it. Many of us are (heavily) pregnant and still working. Learn more about, Realizing I Had PPD After Returning to Work as a Soldier in the U.S. Army, Planned c section too presumptuous??? I didn't want to end up starting a family in my 50s. Sorry I must've misread. Why is she with you? 2. And I still do. I know many people that don't feel a connection to their babies for whatever reason until they are born, it happens and it will definitely change once you see his little face. Source these things out and make a plan to leave. Subscribe to Medium for only $5/month & read ALL my sizzling hot stories! I mean really a woman gets pregnant with your child and there are no options but to marry her? Honestly if I wouldn't of gotten pregnant I would not be with him. The guy obviously does not love the girl in question yet went ahead and had a baby with her out of wedlock. Oh, I agree 100%. We had been dating for maybe a few months before exclusive. In fact, before we found out I was pregnant (which was completely unplanned) I was thinking of breaking up with him. I couldn't be myself with him. It depends on the person. It will not update but downgrade yourself. To begin, the average cost of vaginal delivery in the US, with health insurance, is $4,300. It is something i always knew deep down but i never acted on it. Back then I loved her and I felt sorry for her because she took the decision of getting marry to me even though she didn't love me. Reach out to your family and let them know what's going on. It doesn't, does it? When a woman loves you, she's kind to you. He's controlling. Good luck. If you've only been together 3 mos, where did you live before you met? The end result was the same my siblings and I had the worse upbringing. Is anyone in the same situation. **** will get tough before it gets better, but it will work out in the end. ( though I dont see the first one as a mistake because making babies should not be a mistake.it is the natural order of things).you cant force people to do things out of their wishes and desires. Do you think that she would let you be a father if you two were to split? After a wonderful pregnancy I spontaneously gave birth at 29 weeks. the woman would be unhappy, miserable and resentful as well in the long run for marrying a man who doesnt love her or care if she exists. May you both be happy and healthy. She doesn't want an abortion, and I know it sounds terrible but I keep hoping she will miscarry, however she is 16weeks gone and that's unlikely . I know some people may be asking why having sex with someone you dont love. You could be the best, healthiest, most well adjusted person. Does the father know? This is reason why i always advice Ladies that they need to STOP creating soul ties by sexing guys Sex isnt better than love its about time you Let the men know in upfront that you are not having sex before marriage. I was literally about to break up with her (we were in the process of breaking up), when she announced she was pregnant. MzGee Ditches 3Music TV To Take Over Nana Ama McBrowns Show At UTV. hmmmm my advise to u is to pray to God n ask for forgiveness, i wonder the big talk u used on this gal b4 u got her on bed and now ur running frm ur responsibility. But, learning from the past and making it as a lesson is a different story. In November 2022, I gave birth to my precious baby girl. This discussion is archived and locked for posting. THIS IS THE ENVIROMENT IN THIS SITUATION. More answers below Quora User Managing Partner (Solicitor) & Mechanical Engineer Author has 20.3K answers and 10.7M answer views 1 y Personally, I think you should only have sex with people you are in love with. This is why friends with benefits is never a good idea. Group Owners uphold the core values of the brand by reporting content that violates the community guidelines. To allow yourself to stay in a toxic relationship will be useless. If you want to be a dad, the fear that you'll only see your kid every other weekend and maybe once a week is legit. A Group Leader is a What to Expect community member who has been selected by our staff to help maintain a positive, supportive tone within a group. This is the most stupid guy I have seen in my life twety something years of existance. go and apologise. You will love that baby no matter what when it gets here! Im in the exact same boat man. He is capable of choosing to be with you and not having a child with you, or leaving if he decides he wants a child more. I got pregnant in September of 2011. and our Having a baby is a life-changing experience and many want to ensure they do it at a time that is right for them. We are trying our best but we don't know how long it will last. There are midnight feedings, changing diapers, rocking a screaming infant and little sleep. I have many regrets from the past and can't bear to add another one to the long list. You are in control of your life. Anyways, we decided to get marry after finding out that she was pregnant, even though I had my doubts if it was my baby or not. I don't know if that's just hormones talking or what! He has been nothing but supportive, but I do not love him. "People would say, 'I don't want to have a baby because I don't have money or I don't have time or I don't have a partner,'" he says. I don't know if your feelings of disconnection will pass but I sure hope they do. Satisfaction can be found through bringing up children . Accept That You Will Never Be First. Please specify a reason for deleting this reply from the community. I chose to divorce my husband and my boyfriend of 4yrs has now ditched meit's also the consequence for the actions that I chose GET OUT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My current girlfirend got pregnant while on the mini pill. They didn't want to break up the family. there will be hatred, resentment, and misery. When I did he the. AND NOW EVERY ONE IS UPHAPPY, MISARABLE, INCLUDING THE CHILD. On the contrary, women have been forced to marry men they didn't love for centuries. However I would like children just not in this circumstance you know? (1 to 2 kg . His baby mama got engaged to some dude while pregnant calls her fiance the kid's 'daddy', despite my friend wanting to be a father to his child. Maybe you will need to learn on how to get revenge on a frenemy. Archived discussions are usually a bit older and not as active as other community content. So today at my apt (weekly NST/ ultrasound due to Covid protocol) baby girl measured 8lb 2 ounces and short so they are saying she will be a big baby and have a big headI had my cervix checked and Im not dilated any nor has 35 weeks - desperate to getto finish line ?? I try to act normal as Bella and I sit here talking, even though I'm feeling abnormally attracted to her even . My greatest concern is the child. No going back. I was not in love with the guy I got pregnant by. I am planning to sit tight for now and make sure i am there for her and the child when it comes along. Having a baby can create a bond that encourages mature personal growth and strengthens a couple's commitment to each other -- but that doesn't happen overnight, and more often, it doesn't. I'm curious to find out how it turned out for you. Open-Ended Questions To Ask A Girl (205 Open Ended Questions To Ask A Girl), How To Make A Girl Blush Over Text (101 Things To Say), How To Compliment A Girl Over Text (141 Ways), Qualities Of A Good Woman (29 Vital Qualities), How Often Should You Text A Girl To Keep Her Interested (25 Helpful Tips), Signs A Married Woman Wants You To Make A Move (23 Signs To Look For), How To Turn On A Woman With Words (155 Tips), 27 Obvious Signs A Woman Wants To Sleep With You, Reasons Why Pisces Man Loves Scorpio Woman (9 Interesting Reasons), If He Doesnt Introduce You To His Friends, What Does It Mean? This may not change her decision, but best to be honest. I guess I'm just looking for someone on the same boat because I really wish I could have someone to talk to. No passion. It stressed us kids out like you wouldn't believe, all the kids are dysfunctional, serious trust issues. He was a rebound for me. What to Expect has thousands of open discussions happening each day. In some cases it works, but for many it doesn't. "All of the rational thoughts. I honestly could not ever think of missing out on this child's growing up, especially the early stages. It's why your lady friend just said those two possibly thrilling, possibly terrifying words: "I'm pregnant." So what do you say when the woman you. This difficult parent-child dynamic is most typical of families where one or both parents are narcissistic, but it's not exclusive to narcissists only. The best alterantive is if you can be amicable and stay friends w/your child's mother and cooperate for the kid's sake, although w/the emotions involved that isn't always possible. No need to waste time your life and time on him. or you will be 35 and wondering where your life went and if you'll ever be happy. U r runnin away from marriage cos u didn love her b4 ?? Please, please do not have an abortion like somebody commented. If you don't love her then don't be with her. You can't force yourself to love him. Like, we really, seriously, truly love it. I'm Michelle Devani and would like to take this opportunity to welcome you to my site. Sure, most couples are madly "in love" at first, but as time goes on I think most people who have been married 10, 20, 50+ years will say that love is first a choice and then feelings follow and there are some hard times when the feelings are not there and all you are left with is the choice to show love to this person. Will you make a better progress by doing so? It is helped by a rush of love when the baby arrives, but that doesn't have to be present to create a positive, warm, loving connection which is what love is." For me, even weeks later, those warm . Not. the repercussions and consequences of such an act always plays out. gals are expect dnt 4get. Nobody forces you to live with him, if you really don't like him, you can find a job and leave. Add to Favorites. Welcome to the world little one! A Group Owner is a member that has initiated the creation of a group to connect with other members to share their journey through the same pregnancy & baby stages. With the lowest fertility rate in the . The longer you stay with him the more he's going to think you do have feelings for him and it will only hurt him more in the end. You could have the best partner and tons of family support. Whether the mistake were made with or without your intention, it still your mistake anyway. I need help moving on. YOU CANNOT PROVIDE HAPPINESS WHEN YOU ARE NOT HAPPY. The Preferential Parent. After all, a 70-year-old guy can still have kids. Leaving a pregnant girlfriend with your child, in my view is very selfish and irresponsible. Fertility is amazing, making a baby with your own body is an unreal magical power, feeding that baby with your body is some kind of sci-fi-fantasy level of madness. This relationship is bad for my wife and me. We literally virtually broke up the night before! I do have family but financially they can't help me or buy me a car bc he would be petty enough to keep the one he got me, it's under his name, I don't have anywhere to go or any Finances since I quit my job moving in with him. To cut a long story short I'm in a very My Pregnant Girlfriend is Pushing Me Away. I would sacrifice my own happiness and stay for the kids not interested in been with anyone else just want my girls and soon to arrive boy to be happy? Then suddenly she is all happy, and loved up which I find really hard to believe. At the end of the day, you won't be able to find happiness that you have been looking for. . Dont ever sleep with any girl you are not sure abt. start communicatin with her without quarrellin give her a try n am sure things gonna work out Or r u afraid u wont be able to sleep around or play ur games wen she step into urlife dear dwag such life n face reality. So, chances are, she's not speaking as she normally would. Don't feel guilty if you're not in a constant state of love and bliss when you have a new baby. If you feel a message or content violates these standards and would like to request its removal please submit the following information and our moderating team will respond shortly. What can I do please? I know this is not the time to criticise as the harm has already been caused, but i will still ask: If you claim you dnt love someone, how on earth did u get involved with her, let alone put her in the family way? Please I need your help because I might be pushed to get married when am not prepared. In fact, I was planning on breaking up with him right before I found out I was pregnant. The dilemma I have a female colleague who has, over the past three years, told me she loves me and would like to marry me.The problem is that I do not love her and I have told her that. Married for few months. If you don't want to be controlled, don't make yourself 100% dependent on someone. The views expressed in community are solely the opinions of participants, and do not reflect those of What to Expect. Unfortunately it only lasted 4 and half years because he was becoming abusive. Is it okay for you to feel down all the time thinking about the mistake you did? advice needed h heatha_heatha Posted 2/4/14 My boyfriend and I have only been together since November. THE MOTHER KNOWS THE FATHER DOESNT LOVE HER NOW GUESS WHAT SHE IS ALSO MISARABLE! It wasn't working out before she got pregnant and now it's 100x worse because of her hormones. FTM. as expected the women are been overly sentimental, ganging up on the guy insulting, and throwing reason out the window. I want to be a great Dad, but I don't want to be miserable for the next 18 years - I don't know what to do. No one can tell you what to do, we all have different stories. You had the intention to be with someone for fun without taking the consequences seriously. It's not that they don't want to. Second thing that you can do after having a baby with someone you don't want to be with, how to deal with it is to be responsible. Group Leaders communicate with staff moderators and escalate potential violations for review, but they dont moderate discussions. . I dont want to jump into marriage as if its a job contract I am signing expecting that one day it will expire. Twins & Multiples: Your Tentative Time Table, Planned c section too presumptuous??? My girlfriend is pregnant and suddenly i realize that she may not be all i ever wanted. And both of you surely need to stay in touch. I hope you find what you're looking for. A friend of mine just had a kid w/ someone 1-2 weeks before meeting his current GF (who he loves but is probably leaving him over this - who can blame her?) silly boy so u r one of the stupid men who go abt using girls 4 sex.dont luv her dont touch her. Unless GF is somehow unfit, she'll get custody, meaning she makes the calls and gets support (e.g. Sex is the leading cause of babies. And you will also need to take a firm decision on what you think is best to be done. Everyone has their reasons for doing things and it's not up to us to judge them. It's the kind of care for your emotions, feelings, and love. As a woman, you get insulted for doing it, and you get insulted for not doing it. Rejecting your man's baby mama is almost the same as rejecting your boyfriend's child and you don't want to do that. Broken heart is a usual thing but, what is bad is the action that people choose to take to heal the broken heart itself. Right? I can't bear the thought of breaking up and not being a part to this child's upbringing. Note that once you confirm, this action cannot be undone. we ended u divorcing in 6 years anyway. back out now, "Leaving a pregnant girlfriend with your child, in my view is very selfish and irresponsible. NO BABY no matter what deserves to be killed. Sheffield Utd X Tottenham - Ao Vivo Grtis HD Sem Travar | Futebol Grtis HD. For more information, please see our Right now her parents are planning to bring her over to my house. THE CHILD WILL HAVE MOTHER AND FATHER TOGETHER. Begin speaking about the kids, as well, mentioning different accomplishments they've made lately . Women, in particular, have a growing awareness of the benefits of having babies when they're ready and not having more than they can provide for. My girlfriend admitted to me that she cheated. Okay so long story very short my ex gi Long story short, My current girlfriend keeps in contact wit Long story short. The stories of council-flat, benefit scrounger single mums are so far-fetched. As for my girlfriend, I love this person and i will do my best to make it work out. JP friend, thanks for taking the time to read my post and offer your advise. Couldn't have said it any better And me too guys. I do feel sorry for you and the situation you are in. What to Expect supports Group Black and its mission to increase greater diversity in media voices and media ownership. THEN, MAYBE THEY BREAK UP CUZ THEY CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE. Also, you must then decide if you want to be in the child's life, how you will coordinate co-parenting a kid when you're not in a relationship, etc. Amazed how women can be on these forums. The educational health content on What To Expect is reviewed by our medical review board and team of experts to be up-to-date and in line with the latest evidence-based medical information and accepted health guidelines, including the medically reviewed What to Expect books by Heidi Murkoff. U dont love her bcos u havent made ur mind to do so the moment u sit down to think about this gurl as a grown man n de future, am sure u start developin love for her and am sure u liked her thats why u slept with her what makes u slept with her?? We were fighting like crazy right before we found out she was pregnant. Yes, you can still be happy in a relationship without being married. It's stressful I have strong feelings for him and he says he does to but it's not just are little fantasy anymore things got so rushed and our maturity levels are so different. And a bit frightening. Group Black's collective includes Essence, The Shade Room and Naturally Curly. I tried to make myself love him. 37 weeks today. Even if it does get better, odds are it won't, why would you want to have a life with someone you don't love? Find advice, support and good company (and some stuff just for fun). What to Expect supports Group Black and its mission to increase greater diversity in media voices and media ownership. I was By entering this site you declare I really don't want to mess this child's life up. The baby grew in her, she birthed it, she fed it, and she nurtured it every step of the way. We strive to provide you with a high quality community experience. I've been in one relationship like it and told myself I wouldn't be in one again. YOU'LL BE STABLE. Sorry to say this, but your gf cannot be trusted. Either stay or get off the pot but be careful how you play this. For many, it was an easy decision that often came down to a gut feeling and the common refrain that. I hope everything works out for you. Made a mistake without any intention to make it surely will freak someone out. Does he still love me? He bought it and it is in his name. This is why i found it hard to break up with her although I'd thought about it many times in the past. I know she doesn't want to be with me and I stop loving her and I don't want to be with her anymore. He's not all bad. 1.) The way you wrote that sounds like you think what a man wants is not as important as what a woman wants. So today at my apt (weekly NST/ ultrasound due to Covid protocol) baby girl measured 8lb 2 ounces and short so they are saying she will be a big baby and have a big headI had my cervix checked and Im not dilated any nor has Hi all. Lastly, keeping a child she wanted to abort could cause her to hate the child, it's not guaranteed she would love the child when it was born. My two oldest remember some fighting and the divorce. They had to do it because the marriage was arranged or demanded, as their families saw them as a burden and financial responsibility to be passed on to a man who was willing to take her off their hands. Sometimes people make choices to abort, adopt, or keep the child. Please select a reason for escalating this post to the WTE moderators: Connect with our community members by starting a discussion. a deed frowned upon by society and seen as a problem The deed has already been done instead of advising and coming up with ways to make sure the child is brought up in a obviously deserving loving environment that the child needs instead of an environment filled with resentment, hate, misery, spitefulness etc etc, you all are pushing.insulting and forcing the guy to guy marry the girl in question.. marrying that girl would even be a bigger mistake and problem than the first one. I wish I wasn't pregnant by him. Many things will change during the whole 9 months of pregnancy. *I also grew up in a home where my parents were unhappy. Please whitelist our site to get all the best deals and offers from our partners. I too feel torn by a similar situation. love should beget love and not hate or fear..something society always fails to learn. Well of course he would keep the car. THE CHILD UNSTABLE, EVEN MORE **** UP. Know theways to move on after a bad relationship to help you to get better. She actually is (5 months now), but I took all the words back (the reasons why I didn't want to be with her). Wasn't looking for a sugar daddy. I don't feel that he is someone that I want to be with forever. And the best way to do it is to proof to anyone that this version of you is so much better than you were. Mia, the fascinating thing about postpartum depression and anxiety is that it isn't logical. Not that it matters - if you have feelings for someone else, you can't be in love with your gf so sounds like leaving is the right decision, as staying together for a child with someone you don't love never works out in the long run. A baby doesn't get to choose who his parents are so I think if you feel you won't be able to love your baby, it would be best for the both of y'all to be open to adoption. I just don't think it's right to bring a child into the world when you can see the end of the relationship. SEE THEM EVERYDAY. Most were married to . (11 Possible Meanings), how do I deal with a break up while I am still pregnant his baby, reasons you should know and love yourself before you love someone else, How to Sweep A Cancer Man Off His Feet - Zodiac Signs, 32 Best Reasons to Date a Nurse (The No.1 Caretaker), Things You Need to Know About Dating Portuguese Man (The Sexiest Boyfriend), 35 Crazy and Undeniable Signs That She Friendzoned You, 25 Reasons Why You Should Date The Outgoing Introvert, Reasons to Choose the Girl with the Complicated Pastand How to Love Her Right. IS THAT WHAT SHE/HER DESERVES A GARANTEED **** UP ENVRIOMENT? Likewise, it's also draining, frustrating, and time-consuming. SCENARION 4: HAVE AN OBORTION. I just put myself on hold. You've been clear with him from the start. have condoms been created for monkeys, so silly, i feel for your baby maannnnn, irresponsible parents. We only dated for three months before I got pregnant. I was literally about to break up with her (we were in the process of breaking up), when she announced she was pregnant. Does it feel like pulling teeth getting him to say how he feels about you? LoveDevani is an independent website. We are deciding if we should divorce now or later when she is bigger. AS to your ex, is she still into you, or is it one-sided? Download Preview. I My ex-girlfriend is pregnant. Last updated on June 9, 2022 by Michelle Devani There are many things that may cause a broken heart. Learn more about. You don't even love him. If you don't like something about your life, MAKE A CHANGE. "And Maggie Makes Three" is the thirteenth episode of the sixth season of the American animated television series The Simpsons.
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